Operation Treadmill 2010 is still in effect. I've missed a week of exercise here and there, because of heat, or the exorcism that occurred on my face in late August, or whathaveyou. BUT. I've always climbed back up on the wagon (treadmill). In fact, this is the first time in my adult life when I've implemented an exercise routine and stuck with it even after a bad week. In the past, if I missed a few workouts I threw the whole thing out the window. I'm pretty proud of this fact alone.
It's been 9.5 months. My weight loss has plateaued in a big way. I'd lost 15 pounds by late spring/early summer, and I've put a couple of those back on. I'm still fine with how I look, but a good nutritional plan was eluding me. Back in June I was running a lot of miles. I was going on 5-7 mile runs. I was thinking about training for a 10 mile race in my area, and possibly a half marathon. Everything came to a screeching halt when I didn't support any of it with the right nutrition. I was still restricting calories, and especially carbs, while upping and upping my miles. I got really sick. For 2 weeks I would have a couple hours in the afternoon where I couldn't get off the couch. I was nauseous, exhausted, a mess. (It felt like early pregnancy, but I knew I wasn't pregnant.) I even cried to Bennett one day What is wrong with me? I feel like I'm dying. I was really and honestly worried that something was seriously wrong with my health. I didn't run for a few days because I was feeling too sick, and then I went on a carb binge. After 3 days of eating whatever sounded good (read: lots of carbs) I felt human again. After reading a bit about nutrition and training, it quickly became apparent that I wasn't eating right/enough to support my work outs. So, I started eating more. But running less. And then I missed a week here and there. But I was still eating more. So I gained a few pounds. Which is no big deal, but I felt like I was still left with the mystery of: How can I eat enough to support my work outs (and rev them back up) without gaining more weight, but without feeling sick?
And then I read Master Your Metabolism by Jillian Micheals. Holy smokes. I've never gotten into fad nutrition philosophies or the whole organic movement. My philosophy was always to eat well, lots of produce, not a lot of simple carbs, keep the meat lean, watch your portions, have a treat now and then, ect. This philosophy worked great. Even when I gained weight, I could look at my eating habits and know where I got off track, and get back on track. This whole regular exercising thing really threw me off. I needed more calories, but didn't know how to go about it. Until I read this book! It's amazing! The focus is on whole foods, and total hormonal balance. I learned so much about the hormones of hunger and fullness, as well as stress hormones and girly hormones. I have only made a few changes, over the last few days, but it already feels "right".
It's also been the motivation I needed to keep OT 10 going. I was still enjoying my work outs, but the whole thing felt kind of direction-less. I feel focused again, and I won't lie, I'd love it if another 10 pounds came off ;)
Showing posts with label OT 10. Show all posts
Showing posts with label OT 10. Show all posts
Friday, October 8, 2010
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
It's a bullet-y kind of day.
- I had 8 nights in a row off, kind of by accident. It was heaven. I want to be a SAHM so badly. I've got a couple more years of this WFTOOTHAHI (working full time out of the home and hating it), and then I will likely be able to stay home. I can't wait.
- Last week I ran 7.2 miles! The last mile hurt, I won't lie, but I was so proud of myself for running the entire way. I'm toying with the idea of training for a half marathon in October, but I'm afraid to commit and then not make it. My next goal is a 10 mile race in late July; if that goes well maybe I'll officially make the 13.1 my next goal.
- Jeb is so funny these days. The phrases that come out of his mouth blow me away. I am so torn with wanting him to stay 2 forever, but also loving every new stage. Seriously, I love every age more than the one before.
- He turned 2 and a half last Friday; we had cake and candles and balloons :).
- I've got baby fever so badly I can taste it. There are at least a dozen really, really good reasons we are waiting a few more months to TTC, but it is a daily mental battle to keep it in check.
- The weather has been gorgeous. I can't remember a better spring/start to summer in New England. We have been taking full advantage, and there are so many things I want to do and places I want to go this summer. I am LOVING living so close to the beach; there are only ever 15 minutes between my toes and the sand.
- The business is going well. What a roller coaster. That's all I can say.
- We had a couple over on Sat for a grill out. It was so fun; I really miss entertaining. We used to entertain often in Richmond as we had many more "couple" friends. I hope we can start doing it more, we both really enjoy it.
- Life is good. I am loving our (fairly) simple routines of play, outings, work, and just hanging out.
- Last week I ran 7.2 miles! The last mile hurt, I won't lie, but I was so proud of myself for running the entire way. I'm toying with the idea of training for a half marathon in October, but I'm afraid to commit and then not make it. My next goal is a 10 mile race in late July; if that goes well maybe I'll officially make the 13.1 my next goal.
- Jeb is so funny these days. The phrases that come out of his mouth blow me away. I am so torn with wanting him to stay 2 forever, but also loving every new stage. Seriously, I love every age more than the one before.
- He turned 2 and a half last Friday; we had cake and candles and balloons :).
- I've got baby fever so badly I can taste it. There are at least a dozen really, really good reasons we are waiting a few more months to TTC, but it is a daily mental battle to keep it in check.
- The weather has been gorgeous. I can't remember a better spring/start to summer in New England. We have been taking full advantage, and there are so many things I want to do and places I want to go this summer. I am LOVING living so close to the beach; there are only ever 15 minutes between my toes and the sand.
- The business is going well. What a roller coaster. That's all I can say.
- We had a couple over on Sat for a grill out. It was so fun; I really miss entertaining. We used to entertain often in Richmond as we had many more "couple" friends. I hope we can start doing it more, we both really enjoy it.
- Life is good. I am loving our (fairly) simple routines of play, outings, work, and just hanging out.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
OT 2010 - update
Operation Treadmill 2010 is going well, though much different than what I originally set out to do. I had/have a goal of losing 30 pounds. I am amazed at how slowly it is coming off given how much I am exercising. I've lost 13-14 pounds so far. I've been at this for lamost 19 weeks, that's less than a pound per week for crying out loud! My clothes feel much better, but I'm not in my really skinny stuff yet; I'm not even half way to my original goal even after >4 months.
My goal is changing, though. Not just the number of pounds I hope to lose, but what I am looking for all together. If I wind up losing 30 pounds, you won't hear me complaining. But neither will you if I only lose 20 or 25.
My new goal has much more to do with overall health. I've been taking vitamins every single day for almost 5 months; I've never been this consistent, ever. I'm eating better, and thinking about food differently. (I've never struggled with food, but it's taken some effort to get the portions back to a healthy size) I've been doing a lot of thinking about what it means to be healthy in all areas of my life, and how to manage stress better. I've opted for green tea instead of wine to unwind some (not all ;)) evenings. I've been praying more.
I feel a shift happening. Not any major overhaul; I'm not trying to revamp my whole life. I'm just being more careful about where I put my energy, and move more toward behaviors that bring me feelings of strength and peace. It's almost felt like a surrender. I've been working so hard to deal with all the changes life has brought us over the last few years (well, we've brought them on ourselves) and I've felt close to defeated at times lately. I feel like this shift is a result of me loosening my grip. It wasn't even a decision to loosen my grip, I just got to a point where I feel stripped. It feels better to bring my focus to the small things I can do for myself, and take the rest one day at a time. I feel more vulnerable and stronger all at the same time. It's weird, and I don't really understand much of it yet. I am having a hard time explaining it, but it feels good. It feels quiet, but really really good.
So, I hope the weight continues to come off, but it's not my primary focus.
I am still loving my workouts. I ran a 5K race a few weeks ago and will run an 8K race along the beach this Saturday. It's my Mother's Day gift to myself, and I so can't wait!
My goal is changing, though. Not just the number of pounds I hope to lose, but what I am looking for all together. If I wind up losing 30 pounds, you won't hear me complaining. But neither will you if I only lose 20 or 25.
My new goal has much more to do with overall health. I've been taking vitamins every single day for almost 5 months; I've never been this consistent, ever. I'm eating better, and thinking about food differently. (I've never struggled with food, but it's taken some effort to get the portions back to a healthy size) I've been doing a lot of thinking about what it means to be healthy in all areas of my life, and how to manage stress better. I've opted for green tea instead of wine to unwind some (not all ;)) evenings. I've been praying more.
I feel a shift happening. Not any major overhaul; I'm not trying to revamp my whole life. I'm just being more careful about where I put my energy, and move more toward behaviors that bring me feelings of strength and peace. It's almost felt like a surrender. I've been working so hard to deal with all the changes life has brought us over the last few years (well, we've brought them on ourselves) and I've felt close to defeated at times lately. I feel like this shift is a result of me loosening my grip. It wasn't even a decision to loosen my grip, I just got to a point where I feel stripped. It feels better to bring my focus to the small things I can do for myself, and take the rest one day at a time. I feel more vulnerable and stronger all at the same time. It's weird, and I don't really understand much of it yet. I am having a hard time explaining it, but it feels good. It feels quiet, but really really good.
So, I hope the weight continues to come off, but it's not my primary focus.
I am still loving my workouts. I ran a 5K race a few weeks ago and will run an 8K race along the beach this Saturday. It's my Mother's Day gift to myself, and I so can't wait!
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Operation Treadmill 2010
OT2010 is yielding slow, but steady results. Weight sure doesn't come off as fast as it did even 5 years ago. It's been 5 solid weeks of eating less calories, and exercising 30-35 minutes per day 5 days a week. I'm not even sure of how much I've lost (maybe 6 pounds?) because I don't own a scale and only weigh myself periodically at work. My clothes feel a bit different, but it's not like I'm fitting into any of my old jeans.
BUT, I am still enjoying my Treadmill time very much. I've also added in some Jillian Micheals workouts (OUCH!) to rest my recurring shinsplints. I feel better, and am not discouraged by the slow(er) progress. Hopefully slow changes will = lasting changes.
BUT, I am still enjoying my Treadmill time very much. I've also added in some Jillian Micheals workouts (OUCH!) to rest my recurring shinsplints. I feel better, and am not discouraged by the slow(er) progress. Hopefully slow changes will = lasting changes.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Balance in 2010
Like half (or more) of Americans, I am trying to lose some weight this month/year. 2009 was so busy and stressful, 30 pounds crept on. I had gotten up to the weight I was at 42 weeks pregnant; talk about depressing. None of my clothes fit, I went out and bought a couple pair of pants and they were a size I'd not seen before. Now, I usually don't typically get wrapped up in my weight, or diets. I have an ~8 lb window that I bounce around in, but right now I am way over that window. Even now though, I feel like I look pretty OK, my husband tells me I'm totally hot every day, my self esteem is intact... I just don't feel great at this weight. So, I've started running. Running is always my go-to; I was an avid runner in my teens and early 20s. My MIL gave us her treadmill, which is now in my basement, and I've been climbing on for 30 minutes 5-6 times per week. It feels terrific. I feel terrific. I can't believe how my energy level has picked up, and my daily anxiety has subsided significantly. I've never enjoyed running as much as I am right now, probably because it used to feel like a chore but now it feels like an escape. Some ME time. A chance to clear my head and do something that puts me in a good mood for hours. Whenever I'm in a good exercise phase, my eating improves because I don't want to un-do my work. So I've been eating better (but nothing extreme) as well: bonus.
So today, as I moved from warm up speed to high(er) speed and started to get into my groove I found myself thinking about Balance. What an incredible task it is to find balance as a mother, especially a working mother. Jeb is now 2 years and 1 month old, and I feel like I am just now settling into a rhythm; I am just now juggling all the balls with some success at keeping them all in the air. Twenty five months this has taken me. In all my naivete, I thought by 3 months old it would be old hat. Ha! Although, had someone told me it would take 25, I probably would have punched them out of frustration. It could possibly have happened a bit sooner had we not moved 500 miles and started a business last Spring, but who knows.
As I thought more about Balance, I tried to figure out the how? and the why? because, well, I had 24 more minutes left on the tread mill. As a newborn and infant, Jeb required 90% of my everything. My physical energy, my mental energy, my time, my boobs, my sleep, my attention. I tried to divide my other 10% amongst: work, husband, self, house, misc. This was difficult and really, impossible, because giving 2% each to the other demands is essentially giving ZERO. It was also impossible because I could barely think straight let alone figure out what it meant to give 2% to my husband etc. Oh, and if it happened to be nephew/aunt/mom's birthday this week? Forget it, buying a card and present and getting it mailed took all of that left over 10%. So, I spent most of the first year in absolute un-Balance, and feeling really shitty about it. Everyone else seemed to have it together so much better! Other babies slept through the night! Other women enjoyed going to work! Other couples were going on dates! Well, I can't speak to any of them. Maybe they were fudging the facts, or maybe they weren't. I soon learned that the 3.5% of energy it took to compare myself to them wasn't worth it, since it could be used to scrub a toilet or mail a birthday card.
Things got better in year 2, despite the half dozen major life changes we took on. I stopped crying when I went to work. Husband and I had more time together as Jeb got a little more independant; and by this I mean Jeb would play with a toy for 15 minutes while we had a conversation as B cooked dinner and I wrote out the bills. Whatever, it felt like progress. Unfortunately the 'self' category always gets pushed down to the bottom of the list. Here is where my beloved tread mill re-enters the conversation. For the first time since Jeb has been born, I am carving out a little time to do something for myself. (You know, just like the parenting magazines say to do in a 4 sentence paragraph that addresses NONE of the other realities of what it takes to be a mom. But, I digress...) It's not a once-every-other-month outing with the girls, which really only ever served to make me miss my care-free spontaneous lifestyle. It's not a play date where another mom and I scream over the din discussing molars and bowel patterns. (Although, I really do love play dates.) It's 30 minutes for me to do something that makes me feel physically great and mentally recharged. And! And! It's guilt free because it's in my basement! I don't have to leave the family for an hour or more to go to the gym, feeling like I'm away from Jeb for even more time. It's Balance. For the first time, I feel like I am present at work and able to do my job well. I feel completely connected to my husband and both of our relationship needs are being met; we are in 'team' mode and operating like clock work. I know Jeb is thriving, and has fun every day. My house is in pretty good order; not perfect, but clean and mostly organized. Birthday cards are sent, and it's not an entire day's excursion. Of course things will come up and temporarily disrupt the precious balance, but I also now have an appreciation for the fact that most issues are not catastrophic, and order will return.
Ironically, this new found calm leaves me thinking: We should have another baby!
Haha, not for some time though. I'm really really really looking forward to a year filled with Balance, time with my husband and son, and a rhythm of just living.
So today, as I moved from warm up speed to high(er) speed and started to get into my groove I found myself thinking about Balance. What an incredible task it is to find balance as a mother, especially a working mother. Jeb is now 2 years and 1 month old, and I feel like I am just now settling into a rhythm; I am just now juggling all the balls with some success at keeping them all in the air. Twenty five months this has taken me. In all my naivete, I thought by 3 months old it would be old hat. Ha! Although, had someone told me it would take 25, I probably would have punched them out of frustration. It could possibly have happened a bit sooner had we not moved 500 miles and started a business last Spring, but who knows.
As I thought more about Balance, I tried to figure out the how? and the why? because, well, I had 24 more minutes left on the tread mill. As a newborn and infant, Jeb required 90% of my everything. My physical energy, my mental energy, my time, my boobs, my sleep, my attention. I tried to divide my other 10% amongst: work, husband, self, house, misc. This was difficult and really, impossible, because giving 2% each to the other demands is essentially giving ZERO. It was also impossible because I could barely think straight let alone figure out what it meant to give 2% to my husband etc. Oh, and if it happened to be nephew/aunt/mom's birthday this week? Forget it, buying a card and present and getting it mailed took all of that left over 10%. So, I spent most of the first year in absolute un-Balance, and feeling really shitty about it. Everyone else seemed to have it together so much better! Other babies slept through the night! Other women enjoyed going to work! Other couples were going on dates! Well, I can't speak to any of them. Maybe they were fudging the facts, or maybe they weren't. I soon learned that the 3.5% of energy it took to compare myself to them wasn't worth it, since it could be used to scrub a toilet or mail a birthday card.
Things got better in year 2, despite the half dozen major life changes we took on. I stopped crying when I went to work. Husband and I had more time together as Jeb got a little more independant; and by this I mean Jeb would play with a toy for 15 minutes while we had a conversation as B cooked dinner and I wrote out the bills. Whatever, it felt like progress. Unfortunately the 'self' category always gets pushed down to the bottom of the list. Here is where my beloved tread mill re-enters the conversation. For the first time since Jeb has been born, I am carving out a little time to do something for myself. (You know, just like the parenting magazines say to do in a 4 sentence paragraph that addresses NONE of the other realities of what it takes to be a mom. But, I digress...) It's not a once-every-other-month outing with the girls, which really only ever served to make me miss my care-free spontaneous lifestyle. It's not a play date where another mom and I scream over the din discussing molars and bowel patterns. (Although, I really do love play dates.) It's 30 minutes for me to do something that makes me feel physically great and mentally recharged. And! And! It's guilt free because it's in my basement! I don't have to leave the family for an hour or more to go to the gym, feeling like I'm away from Jeb for even more time. It's Balance. For the first time, I feel like I am present at work and able to do my job well. I feel completely connected to my husband and both of our relationship needs are being met; we are in 'team' mode and operating like clock work. I know Jeb is thriving, and has fun every day. My house is in pretty good order; not perfect, but clean and mostly organized. Birthday cards are sent, and it's not an entire day's excursion. Of course things will come up and temporarily disrupt the precious balance, but I also now have an appreciation for the fact that most issues are not catastrophic, and order will return.
Ironically, this new found calm leaves me thinking: We should have another baby!
Haha, not for some time though. I'm really really really looking forward to a year filled with Balance, time with my husband and son, and a rhythm of just living.
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