I am so distracted by stress, I can't possibly write about anything else. I've meant to come and write several times, but I'm struggling to even think and breathe through the stress. Now I am at work, which actually helps, so I'm just going to unload.
The culprit? Being the wife of a Small Business Owner. AKA, money. Like, having none.
Our money situation right now is laughable. There is no safety net. I have had the only income for 13 months, now, which has been OK. It's been tight, but I've been able to support the family. But, our childcare situation will be changing any day, and I literally don't have the funds to afford the kind of place I want to send Jeb. The money just.isn't.there. I break down in tears every time I think about compromising my standards on where he goes.
The business is in a tough position right now because it's a Landscape/Snow Removal business. We had record LOW snow fall this winter. The snow $ was supposed to buy the mulch, and B was supposed to be able to start having an income. Well, there is no snow $, and B is losing his mind trying to figure out how to buy mulch. And there is obviously no way he can take a pay check.
There are a couple of possibilities: loan? investors? help from corporate (it's a franchise)? inheritance that we've been waiting on for a year? a miracle? the lottery?
I can't work anymore hours, especially because child care is an issue.
I hate blogging about something as dumb as money.
On top of it all? My loser neighbor sent a letter to the Chief of Police that I still hadn't switched my license plates from VA to MA. A cop showed up on my porch to tell me he'd be taking me to court if I didn't get it resolved. So, in the middle of one of the most stressful weeks of my life, I had to spend 3 hours (and hundreds of dollars that I can't afford) at the DMV. With a 2 year old. It was about as fun as you'd think.
My head is going to explode.
Tomorrow I will write about the fantastic week Jeb and I had despite my wanting to puke and/or cry at any minute. I refuse to let money make me unhappy.